Friday, October 21, 2005

I Am So Over Playing Games

So, It's probably been a month since I have actually seen "the boy". We have been talking to each other via text messages (I can't talk on the phone....I just can't) for a while, and I thought things were going well. Granted, we don't really know each other that well, and we live 400 miles away so it's hard to get to know someone really well over the phone. He has told me on several occasions that he wants to see the next time I'm in DC, and keeps wondering when I'll be in town. The problem is, that about 2 weeks ago, he practically stopped talking to me. Granted, we are not dating so there is no real reason for me to get angry or upset, but if you are going to talk to me then talk to me. If you aren't going to talk to me then let me know. Please don't play the whole, I'm not going to talk to you and string you along game. I used to play that game with every guy I dated and look where it has gotten me....nowhere. I am 23 and I have been through so much these past 4 years, and I am over playing games. I feel that they are demeaning and immature. I am afraid to call him out on it, as I'm not really in a position to, but if this doesn't end soon, I'm just going to end the whole thing. I will be in DC this weekend, which "the boy" knows, so hopefully he will call me to do something. If not, I'll probably call him out on it in a drunken rage Saturday night. I am hoping for option one as I have drunken drama, but I absolutely refuse to play the chasing game.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005


The past week has been spent text messaging "the boy". What about? Nothing really. Just random stuff through out the day. He did basically tell me that he couldn't wait to see me on my next trip to DC. So that was exciting.

Friday night, my favorite sister, Tess, came into town from DC. We goofed around until she went out with one of her friends. I was supposed to go out with a friend from high school, but I realized that I only have $5 til Friday, and it wasn't worth overdrafting my account just to go get drunk so I just showered and went to bed.

Saturday, since my sisters were in town (my other sister lives in Toledo 3 hrs away), we went shopping. I got nothing, sigh. I was nice just to be around my sisters, though, since we rarely ever together all at once. That night we went to see a production of Footloose. It was really boring. I would have rather been at the Montgomery Gentry concert with my brother-in-law, "the boy", and their other friends. I heard it was an awesome concert, though, and I was very jealous I couldn't be there to see it.

Sunday consisted of more shopping. Tess bought me new panties at Victoria's Secret. There's nothing like feeling pretty when you have a new pair of panties on. I was very tired from staying out late on Saturday, so the rest of the day was spent laying on the couch watching TV. I also attempted to quit smoking, and did for about 16hrs until I couldn't stand the withdraw anymore. Maybe I'll try again in another couple of weeks.

So, that was pretty much how I spent my weekend. I did catch up on a lot of my sleep I have lost in recent weeks. At least I accomplished something. Yesterday was spent working (or hardly working in my case). I had to go pick up a wedding gift for a co-worker after work, and so I wouldn't have to drive home during rush hour, I picked up some new eye shadow at SAKS. I had a migraine, so as soon as I got home I went to bed.

After work, today, I am going to get my hair cut and colored. It has been about 2 months since it's been done. So, I'm very excited.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Not Sure What It Is.....

and I never thought I would say this, but life it really boring right now. I used to say that there was never a dull moment in my life, but right now, I'm experiencing a lot of dull moments. I'm sick of work and my co-workers. I am sick of my parents and their self-inflicted drama. I'm sick of the people I associate with. UGH! I need to get out of this funk I've been in for the past couple of months. I've even resorted to smoking (again) to try and calm my depression. Nothing is working. I feel like I need to get out of Akron. I know I say this every year, but it's true. I think that the people in this city are dragging me down. I can't seem to get over the past and move onto the future. The same old s**t keeps dragging me into a hole that get deeper and deeper everyday. If only I didn't have all those bills to pay, I could have been out of here months ago. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to cope as best I can and hopefully make it through another winter here in Northeast Ohio.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

"The Boy"

So, first I have to post this picture of the Contintental Color Guard at the Spirit of America Show in Cleveland. They're so adorable! My brother-in-law is the guy on the left.

So, now for an update on "the boy". I went back to DC this weekend to visit my sister, and had a very fun time. I mostly slept, but we went to Walmart and bought Halloween decorations and decorated her apartment. That was very fun (more than you know). We were all going to go out Saturday night, but the boys had to be at work at 2:30 Sunday morning, so that plan was ruined. Anyway, I talked to "the boy" through text messages Sunday night before I left to drive back to Akron. I have talked to him a couple of other times this week. My sister actually met him Monday night and approves of him. I asked her what she thinks of him and she said he's very cute, and he's very sarcastic. I'm very sarcastic as well, so I think we understand each other's humor. She asked whether I want to date him, but I told her I'm not sure at this point. We're just talking. I mean, I practically know nothing about him, except for what he does in the Army (which is dress up like George Washington). His birthday was on Tuesday and I told him that next time I am down in DC, that we would go out to celebrate since he basically did nothing exciting for his birthday. He said that we will definately go out next time I am in DC. I'll take that as a good sign that he wants to at laest spend a little time with me. I'm hoping to keep talking to him 'til then so I can get to know him better.